@actuallyautistic
Autism is often described as having a different operating system for our minds than non-autistics. One of the ways that this is most clearly demonstrated, is in the communication challenges that can exist between us. For me, this is because there is a fundamental difference in how communication is primarily used and understood.
I believe that autistics and many others, are primarily concerned with the exchange of information and that the clearer and "purer" that information is, the better. So the first act of any communication is to transmit that information as fully as possible. Secondary considerations are doing so in a way that you know will make that information more accessible. Shaping it for the audience, so to speak. And only finally will there be any thought of possible social niceties about the exchange and only then, if the level of masking, or social awareness allows for it.
Allistic primary consideration for communication, though, appears to be social. How will it fit into and effect their place within the hierarchy. How the communication can be shaped for maximum effect within this framework. Secondary considerations then become how much of the information can be imparted in the initial phase and how clear it can be. With perhaps much of the information being held back for further exchanges, once the social aspect and hierarchy has been established.
This also, obviously, applies to receiving communication. Autistics will look initially for the information, the simple, unadorned facts and necessary instructions. Whereas allistics will be looking for the social constructs before trying to establish what information is being exchanged and how to process and respond to it within those constructs. This simple difference in emphasis, is, if you think about, possibly responsible for so many of our problems. Why, for example, our need for as much clearly defined information as possible in the first instance, even to the point of multiple questions asked, is so often seen as rude or pushy. Or why our habits of info dumping and bare-bones facts, just being delivered straight and to the point, can come across as arrogant, or unhelpful. Because neither conform to the allistic's assumptions, or needs.
Of course, this is a classic double-empathy problem. But, what can make it harder to see and understand, is that such fundamental differences in how and why we communicate, are not always obvious or the sort of thing that people realise. Also, even if people are vaguely aware of what they are doing, the assumption, if anything, is normally, well isn't this how everyone does it.
[#]Autism
[#]ActuallyAutistic
[#]Neurodivergent
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@pathfinder @actuallyautistic Your description of allistics sounds disturbingly like a description of SOCIOPATHS. Not identical, but close. Everything said is first and foremost for effect. The difference is whether truth is even a secondary consideration, or not a consideration at all.
Long before my very recent realization that I am myself autistic, I had observed that although typical ordinary people are not sociopaths, they much closer to being sociopaths than most of them would think possible. Your theory of allistic communication looks to me like a validation and explanation of this grim truth.
Having now realized that what I thought of as a collection of personal quirks adds up to autism, and makes for a much deeper divide than I would have thought possible between myself and the vast majority of humanity, I am frankly beginning to be horrified at the emerging picture of the social world I live in. Allistics are starting to look like disguised lizard people out of a grade B horror movie, or the alien monsters from "They Live", who likewise disguise themselves as people. This picture is painted with a broad brush, and is clearly exaggerated — but how MUCH of an exaggeration is it, really?
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@dedicto @pathfinder @actuallyautistic
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I think of it like “severe allism”
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@punishmenthurts @pathfinder @actuallyautistic The adjective "severe" implies that allism is a pathology. I like that.
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@dedicto @punishmenthurts @pathfinder @actuallyautistic "hello Parent and Parent. I'd like to speak with you about Child's behavior at school. There have been numerous reports of bullying and other problematic behavior. With your permission, we'd like to do an evaluation. No, no, it's too soon to say . . . but yes, we do think it is possible that your son is on the Allistic Spectrum. It may be quite severe, yes.
Don't cry! These days many Allistics go on to live happy and productive lives! With proper support, Child may be able to integrate into the classroom and learn with the other children. But for now here are some pamphlets in our specialized educational programs and some general information about Allism, and local support groups for parents."
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