In a much lower stakes context, I now wonder (belatedly, in my early 40s) if the reason I seem to piss people off in corporate settings is that I try (naively?) to focus on the content of a discussion or situation (e.g., how do we solve for this technical or organizational problem in an economically efficient way), rather than trying to focus on playing to the status fulfillment of the various players in the scene (e.g., how do I make the highest ranking people feel good about themselves and attribute those positive feelings to me).
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