Companies: when customers are on-hold, make sure to remind them you have a website that has words on it. Bonus points if the website tells them to call.
Keep them on-hold as long as possible. They'll give up, but can't leave unless they speak to you. Plus you can sack all your phone operators. Win-win.
Lastly, carefully curate B-tier pop from 5-10 years ago. Once the phone system lops off the high/low frequencies, compresses it to ~56kbps and runs it through the PSTN it'll sound fantastic.
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