Ancestors

Toot

Written by A More Honest Dystopia on 2025-01-30 at 02:49

please note:

there are few things in this hell more despicable than a white person using their marriage to a not white person as an qualifying excuse for their racist opinions

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Descendants

Written by Viss on 2025-01-30 at 02:52

@h2onolan i know a couple like this here in town. we were friends for years, but then they went all antivax and we got real worried, then the guy joined the sherrifs reserves just so he could get a ccw. then they went all trumpo.

we dont talk anymore. his wife is mexican. no idea how she copes

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Written by A More Honest Dystopia on 2025-01-30 at 02:57

@Viss real sociologists have written papers on the phenomenon. something about being close to whiteness is valuable from a survival/kid opportunity perspective.

i know a few pairs. one or two go the other way and the white half fights on the human side. heartening.

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Written by Viss on 2025-01-30 at 02:58

@h2onolan ah. yeah that makes sense. they have a kid.

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Written by cR0w :cascadia: on 2025-01-30 at 02:52

@h2onolan I never understood that "I can't be racist, my spouse is !white" line of thinking. That's like saying a man can't be a misogynist because he's married to a woman. We all know that's not true.

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Written by Steven Saus [he/him] on 2025-01-30 at 09:53

@cR0w @h2onolan

As someone who has dated multiple people of color, I'm still learning the ways that I've had bigoted crap buried in my head, despite my best efforts.

Having a partner who is willing to call me out on it helps, but then again, you have to be willing to look at your partner as both an equal and yourself as fallible... both qualities that bigots tend not to have.

(or in other words: Yes, what you said.)

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Written by Bilal Barakat 🍉 on 2025-01-30 at 10:13

@cR0w @h2onolan @aral

Yes, although to play devil's advocate: they would argue that an (assumed straight) man being married to a woman doesn't tell us anything about his preferences and by implication attitudes, but that having a non-white spouse is a choice and that choice tells us something.

Definitely not saying that's a good argument, but I suppose that's what the argument is supposed to be, for what it's worth.

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Written by sunflowerinrain on 2025-01-30 at 11:40

@cR0w @h2onolan A friend invited me to a gathering of his mates who were all married to Thai women. The men sat in one room with their lager and sportball, the women were in another room. They put me with the blokes. Ten minutes of their shockingly racist mysogynistic chat, and I sneaked out to beg to join the women.

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