Ancestors

Toot

Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 16:40

Hey, everyone! I'm back from my break from Fedi.

To start things off, here's a blog post in which I rethink my relationship with social media given my experience in this week without it:

https://benjaminhollon.com/musings/thoughts-on-social-media/

I'll be back later, once I've gotten some work done.

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Descendants

Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 18:04

So far a bunch of people have replied to my post about wanting to constrict my social media usage here on fedi but no one has replied via email. 😢

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 20:19

I take it back! I've received a couple great replies via email, which I appreciate a lot!

Seriously, a reply by email to a post tends to make my day.

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Written by Dave on 2025-01-20 at 16:43

@amin Good blost, and I like the intentionality. I go through bouts of that, but fall back into bad habits after a misstep or two. I hope you have better luck with it than I do!

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 16:46

@dm

Yeah, hopefully so. We'll see how it goes.

I'm gonna try to fallback on more blogging and see if that helps.

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Written by Ivan 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 16:50

@amin

I'm a social media

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 16:50

@libreivan

Ivannnnn!!!! :D

But I gotta nitpick there—"media" is plural, "medium" is singular. ;)

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 16:51

@libreivan

But then I believe in your ability to represent media in the plural form!

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Written by sotolf on 2025-01-20 at 16:56

@amin

I have a little point on the always online point that you mentioned in your post, not sure if it applies to you, but I have some ways that I've used to get around that thing. I think one way that the fediverse is actually quite good is that it's not expected that a person is always available, in contrast to chats like discord, matrix, signal etc. Which is why I avoid places like that.

I also have a weird way of tackling the always online thing, but it works for me, so hey! :p I don't have data for my phone, so the only times that I really can be online is when I'm in wifi range. This also means that I predownload things and have them on my phone, things like music, youtube videos, podcasts and the like, I all have them downloaded on my phone. So that I have stuff to procratrinate with, but I'm not online. The funny thing that knowing that anything I have there can wait, there is no need for me to go grab it now™ really has been slowly training me to avoid my phone unless I really want to do something on it.

In addition I have silenced almost anything on my phone, so nothing can give me warnings, anything that happens will have to wait until I take the time to look at the phone.

Not sure if that is helpful to you in any way, but that's the way that I have found works for me, that way I actually can keep having stuff like social media, but not having it eating up my time.

It also helps quite a bit that I have gotten into a habit of mostly grabbing my e-book if I'm seeking entertainment, because I kind of think that going for SoMe when your mind kind of craves entertainment ends up in weird places some times.

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 17:06

@sotolf

Good thoughts!

While I agree with you that fedi is less "you must respond now" than instant messaging, instant messaging in some cases is easier to let pile up for a few days if you know you won't be around and let people know. With fedi, the posts you've missed, you're not likely gonna see again unless you go hunting. (Hence the "ephemerality" point you mentioned.)

I'm gonna experiment with that and see if I can come up with a mix that works for me.

I do need to get back in the habit of grabbing a book instead of social media, that's something I've fallen out of practice in.

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Written by Nick (Alatar the Blue) on 2025-01-20 at 17:00

@amin

Welcome back. Will read when not driving.

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 17:07

@alatartheblue

"Not driving" is a good time to read things, yes! :)

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Written by Steve Foerster 🌐 on 2025-01-20 at 18:08

@amin @alatartheblue Instructions unclear, no longer reading stop signs and do not enter signs.

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 18:47

@stevefoerster @alatartheblue

Oops!

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Written by COD on 2025-01-20 at 17:28

@amin I'm going to disagree that social media is good and creating and maintaining relationships. Creating, maybe, but to maintain a relationship you have to move it beyond social media. When I quit Twitter, after posting daily for 10+ years, I did so with no goodbye note or warning. I just quit posting. Exactly zero people messaged me to check in or make sure I was okay, mainly because nobody noticed. I've read of that experience with quite a few people too.

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 18:01

@chrisod

Well, sure, I'm not saying social media should be the only place for a relationship, I'm more pointing out its role as a place where people can go to see how all their friends are doing in one location.

That said, in the right community a feed aggregator from personal blogs could play that role.

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Written by Clayton on 2025-01-20 at 18:02

@amin I think the other thing about taking a break is the FOMO syndrome. Once one can overcome that then social media is just an outreach platform.

I would agree the good of social media can bring about a sense of community, but you don’t need that to be with everyone. There’s that small group that you build to help each other and do build that friendship in a way.

Social media and always being online can have its issues too. I read this post this week too: https://82mhz.net/posts/2025/01/you-dont-need-to-be-connected-to-the-whole-world/

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 18:03

@clayton

I read that post this week too, while on my FediBreak. ;)

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Written by OpenComputeDesign on 2025-01-20 at 18:08

@amin In my defense, it usually takes me about a month of anxiety to send an email :P

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 18:47

@OpenComputeDesign

I'll expect an email in a month, then. ;D

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Written by OrbitalMartian on 2025-01-20 at 19:11

@amin Lies… there should be at least 1.

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 19:22

@orbitalmartian

There is now! ;D

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Written by CJ on 2025-01-20 at 19:29

@amin To be fair, if I had a reply I probably would have just sent it on Signal or something. Email is the bane of my existence these days.

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 19:30

@roguefoam

Sounds like you should work out some changes to your email setup, then. That's what I did a year or so again and I'm much happier with it now. :)

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Written by CJ on 2025-01-20 at 19:33

@amin I need to but....that's a lot of work right now.

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 19:33

@roguefoam

Understood. :)

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 19:33

@roguefoam

I'm working on some different changes now, since aerc (which I switched to from Thunderbird) unfortunately is very fixed in the always-online mindset.

I've got mbsync and notmuch syncing and indexing a local copy of my email, now I'm just trying to figure out more and more ways to interact with that local copy and sync it up when I'm online.

aerc does have notmuch support but I haven't interacted with it much yet.

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Written by sotolf on 2025-01-20 at 19:54

@amin @roguefoam meh emails are mostly just spam and bad news, don't want to associate you with that ;)

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Written by Amin Hollon 🏳 on 2025-01-20 at 20:04

@sotolf @roguefoam

I curate mine well enough that mine are pretty good signal-to-noise. :)

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Written by sotolf on 2025-01-20 at 20:07

@amin @roguefoam so you just delete bills and bad news? :p

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Written by OpenComputeDesign on 2025-01-20 at 20:08

@sotolf @amin @roguefoam Whenever I can, yes ;)

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Written by sotolf on 2025-01-20 at 20:10

@OpenComputeDesign @amin @roguefoam I tried just deleting all the bills once when I was deepest in my depression, not a good Idea, they tend to just grow and they become more :p

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Written by OpenComputeDesign on 2025-01-20 at 20:15

@sotolf @amin @roguefoam I lost my learner's permit once. couldn't find it for the life of me.

Finally found it like five years later, turned out I never even opened the envelope, I just saw it was from the DMV and tossed it into a pile of expired textbooks I also didn't feel like dealing with

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