Nice weather today for a ride to the river. A lot of laughs and smiles, that kind of stuff is always precious. Also, I saw Perséphone interacting with another human in nice ways.
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Lots of feelings today. Not all positive. Work helped a bit with that.
I'll try to focus on the best for these days to come. New things in my head, a lot of new pretty memories. I feel lucky when I think about it.
I forgot: NEW LEAF INCOMING ON THE MONSTERA AAAH
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Online presentation for Echap went super well and this is one less stressful thing in my head.
Heartstopper last season is just :blob_melt_sob_love:
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Tonight rehearsal was nice and we're getting better, learning stuff together is a great experience.
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Smooth chill day alone at home with some cooking, tv shows, picross and nice tea.
Also I think this thread is now more than six months old, and I didn't miss a day. Yay me!
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All chores done, I played videogames, worked a bit, read (and also finished a book).
I feel fine and relaxed (thank you magnesium). Will read again a bit before sleep.
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A big piece of work is (almost I hope?) done. I went swimming with a dear one and had a nice call with another. A very good day indeed.
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Another work stuff related done, yay! And a nice evening with loved ones and good food. I feel good.
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Today was kind of a perfect balance between almost everything.
Cuddles with Perséphone, workout, work, lunch with my cousin so a little bit of biking (also almost an accident with another bike but everything's alright), work again where I feel I did something nice, talking with some people online, playing video games.
I'm saying almost because I would have loved to have hugs from someone. But still a very good day.
I feel all the hard work I've been doing for months is finally starting to pay off. I'm getting there!
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Not a very good day but at least the work is done again.
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Working is starting to be really tough, but still a lot to do. I feel I'm getting there. Baby steps. I showed my mom one of my big projects in progress and she was impressed. That's a huge reward I think.
Not a perfect day but tomorrow will obviously be better.
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Slow day but a bit busy though?
I worked and cooked and I tried to put some makeup and a nice dress I never dare to wear. I felt beautiful and it's been ages since I had this feeling for real. I also had a very nice evening with my friends, was drunk and happy to share food and laughs.
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Did not get all the chores done but still a lot. Played video games a bit. No hangover but very tired right now. Would like to go to bed and cuddle someone.
Perséphone will get that, obviously.
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Hard time to get out of bed this morning because of the lack of sleep but I still did a lot of work. Tthis is the 3rd week we're going to swim and I feel fantastic! My body seems relaxed, super tired but in a very good way. And I had diner with this cutie pie. <3
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Today was a bit weird but I managed to do some things and I saw my dear friend.
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I DID IT! Work is not completely done but I did the hard part and I feel FREEEEEE!
(I'm not)
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Very good session with the band tonight. I feel we're getting better and we like what's happening. A good vibe. I wouldn't mind to do this every week I guess.
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Rough morning but I still managed to finish the work I've been redoing last two days. And the workout also! I really hope I'm not sick but, we'll see about that tomorrow.
Now my head is full of very cheesy things. :blobcatheart:
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Extra hour of sleep was very welcome today. Did the workout, the chores, finished the jigsaw puzzle, played video games and watched a TV show. Normal solo sunday.
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Monday was slow. But swimming is still great.
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Today I had some sweet time with my friend who took care of me and I felt less ugly than usual.
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Today I had a nice time with my friend, we talked for hours and had good food.
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Today it's been 2 months since I started exercising again. Also, tonight I saw some nice live shows and ate a very good pizza.
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I took everything slowly today.
Feel good.
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I walked into the city, we had a great day with sun.
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Had some time with my friends in the sun today.
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Trying Nudevember again and I'm happy with these 4 pictures so far. It's been a while since I tried to make pictures so I can say it's not that bad for a restart.
Also, I went to the swimming pool and had diner with my friends and it's always a very nice time. I feel tired but super relaxed because of the swimming, it's working well on me.
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I played Minecraft again tonight and I still love to begin new maps with other people.
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I had a long meeting online tonight but I needed to get some things off my shoulders and it helped.
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Really hard to find something today.
At least I'm COVID/flu vaccinated.
Edit: one of my friends gave me a nice little gift.
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This is gonna be very hard right now. But I need to write something or my head will explode.
I cried so much yesterday night and today that my eyes hurt. Luckily I asked for help and wasn't alone the whole day.
I knew it would be hard. I mean. I already know how it feels to lose someone you love so much. But I didn't think I would miss the chance to say goodbye again. Not like that. Not after all these years thinking about how to deal with it.
I don't think I have something really positive to write about today. But I'll remember those years together as just as precious that they were. And all the people around us, all the things we did all together. Especially thinking about the people you are leaving behind and that I get the chance to know and to love today. They're a fucking precious gift.
As you said to me once: "Ce monde est mieux avec toi pour l'habiter." And yes, the world was a better place with you in it. But it's just a ride.
As I said before: so long, love.
Amanda Palmer - The Ride
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XGwFtdVpVMI
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Today I felt it again. This fucking tremendous love. Not just for him, but for her, and her, and him. Today is the second day, where my broken heart is feeling I'm not alone in this and they're all around, feeling it. Sadness is still here, but they're too.
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I didn't cry as much as yesterday.
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Today I had very long conversations with people I admire a lot and I was invited to a birthday party.
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Didn't die I guess.
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It is very hard.
Some people are here. I feel grateful but ashamed.
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Still very hard to be in this situation where you're not enough. So tired.
I saw a dear friend tonight after another one took care of my hair. Also: no panic attack today.
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Again, a hard day (days without tears: 0) but I gave my blood and it was about time (2013).
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Tears again but I saw some friends. Stressed out by the next days but I won't be alone.
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A lot of tears but a lot of laughs also. Dear friends are here.
I've met some really nice people for real tonight.
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I don't know how I'm able to type words right now. It's been terrifying, weird, sad, beautiful, nice, interesting, hopeful...
Too much.
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I managed to do some chores and a bit of work today and that's a miracle.
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I heard the voice of my sister through the phone.
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The rest of the band gave me a condolence card. They were very nice to me.
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We watched Sister Act together tonight.
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In all this nonsense, between the tears, I shared something and felt it stronger while the music changed a bit.
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Live session with Echap went well.
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Loved ones everywhere today. <3
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Emotions, emotions, emotions.
(both)
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Family time and good food today, but also, I heard a very nice voice over the phone.
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Feeling weirdly sad and happy at the same time. I found something new, and I decided to keep it with me.
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I had nice family time today.
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Coming back home was a good idea and I'm with Perséphone again.
Also, feelings.
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I managed to do my workouts again today after stopping 3 weeks ago. I also lost 5-6kg during this same period, and it's not that good. But I'm trying to see a silver lining here: I may be able to wear my old pants again. And weirdly... I feel better in my body somehow. And still. Feelings.
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Working out + physiotherapy + 1km in the water. I hope I'll get a good night of sleep after that.
Also I did a lot of work and made plans.
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Worked a lot today.
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I had a really great night, we worked on a recorded and filmed rehearsal for a teaser and I hope it'll be nice, but we had so much fun.
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I managed to do a lot of things today even I had the feeling that everything had been turned upside down.
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It's been one month. I'm not crying everyday and that's a relief. I chose to set boundaries with some people and I chose to be closer to others. I still feel very lucky to have certain people in my life. I learn a great deal from them. They're like gifts I'm never expecting. And tonight, even if I can still feel this supermassive black hole inside, I feel loved and valued. Well. I may cry after all.
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I had a nice call with someone I like very much today.
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I unlocked a success on InDesign so I'm a bit proud.
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@lila_bliblu
Tu as écouté un enregistrement de toi en train de chanter c'est ça ?
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@vitria
Irk non l’angoisse.
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@lila_bliblu
Tu devras en passer par là pour atteindre l'album de Platine :blob_cat_sip:
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@vitria
Je préfère revoir mes ambition à la baisse du coup !
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@vitria arrête de draguer @lila_bliblu éwè
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@raphitherockett @lila_bliblu
lila* chante bien that's all i am sayin' ¯_(ツ)/¯
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@lila_bliblu GG
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text/gemini