Ancestors

Written by Technology Connections on 2024-08-20 at 16:49

Look, I'm gonna lay this out on the line:

This place is fucking shit for my mental health.

It's that simple!

And it is not helped that any time I voice this, I get replies which one way or another make it clear it's my problem to solve.

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Written by Technology Connections on 2024-08-20 at 16:52

I don't like being a whiny person, so largely I'm not. I recognize I've won life's lottery in lots of ways and have privileges many, MANY people don't.

But I am still a person.

And while I'm grateful for all the supportive replies I get here, there's sincerely about a 1:1 ratio between those and replies which push me away.

It is simply not fun for me to be here. And I'm damn sure that's not my problem.

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Written by ftg on 2024-08-20 at 17:57

@TechConnectify

Holy shit, 1:1 ratio ratio?

That's so much worse than I expected.

This platform hides so much from so many.

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Written by Technology Connections on 2024-08-20 at 18:01

@ftg I feel I need to clarify what I mean by "push me away"

I use the term "gaslit" a lot here and, well, that's because there's a lot of people who will respond to my negative experiences with what I would call very qualified empathy.

Something like "I'm sorry you're experiencing this, have you tried X?" is not really what I need in the moment. It's "works on my machine" but said only slightly more tactfully.

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Toot

Written by Technology Connections on 2024-08-20 at 18:03

@ftg I understand where this comes from - people who believe in this place want me to stay here.

But what I'm trying to articulate is that expecting me to patch this place up to meet my needs is an unreasonable expectation. This is plainly evident to me, and it's really the whole "just pick an instance! it doesn't matter. but also it does!" confusion rehashed without any understanding of what that was so off-putting in the first place.

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Descendants

Written by ftg on 2024-08-20 at 18:08

@TechConnectify

Expecting everyone to manually un-fuck things on a site is very much not the way to go.

"just pick an instance! it doesn't matter. but also it does!"

Yep, mine filters mastodon.social.

And I often get to click "Open Original Page" to properly see all the replies in a thread, because it's normal for for quarter to half of them to be just missing and not loading.

I recently also got some replies that just did not show up at all for me.

Replies to me.

Others did see them.

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Written by Sin Vega on 2024-08-20 at 20:12

@ftg @TechConnectify yeah, adding to the problem is that it's not even clear on here WHEN it's actively preventing you from doing things. You can just miss a load of stuff with no explanation or notice, without anyone ever asking if that's what you wanted

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