TFW your own post gets hidden on your timeline because of your filters.
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Kinda cool to make the public enemies list by “Being cute AF.”
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Got “sir”ed at the checkout counter.
I just replied with a skeptical, “ma’am.”
The clerk immediately corrected to, “oh, ma’am.”
It still ruined my selfies the rest of the afternoon. They all curdled and looked like dude pics.
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Some days, it feels so strangely wonderful to be me.
I’m a girl, and that’s a dream come true.
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Lift your eye from the palantir - you will not defeat Sauron.
Do not speak to me of how you can do nothing to turn the ship of state. I care nothing for your impotency.
You abdicate your responsibility by widening your gaze. Who are you to speak to me of the horrors of national policy? A legislator? No? Then do not clothe yourself in the false agency of your inability to change that which is entirely beyond your reach.
But you can make sure bigots at the grocery store stay quiet in the dairy aisle.
You can rebuke the old men who insult young fathers for caring for their children.
You can ask trans women in the women’s bathroom where they got their nail polish.
You can invite trans men on your guys-only fishing trip.
You can watch a mother’s kids for her while she goes back into the school to find a lost jacket instead of criticizing her parenting.
You can accept that everyone whose pronoun is the singular “they” already knows all your petty objections to it and just… use “they” for them.
You can assume everyone you meet has a right to live where they live.
You can make it weird when people try to use “gay” as an insult.
You can listen to kids when they want to tell you about their niche special interest.
You can tell men you think it’s gross when they touch waitresses.
You can make the experience of being in your presence more friendly and less hostile to the kinds of people being oppressed by the state.
THAT is what is within your reach. THAT is your responsibility. And I expect you to see to it that it gets done, and that you remind others of THEIR responsibilities.
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My wife just addressed me as “pretty girl,” and chat, I just about lost my damn mind.
🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
[#]TransJoy
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Music suggestions welcomed! My current fav playlist is Beth McCarthy, Chappell Roan, girli, and Kim Petras - who should I add?
Thanks, chat!
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I’m cold and six hours overdue for my shot. Uuuuuuugh. Motivation: 0. Desire for memes: 100. Energy for shot: null.
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Estrogen: it’s like liquid nitrogen.
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I’m coooooold. I miss my bathrobe. (It’s hanging to dry after a spin through the wash.)
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When cis people craft jokes that are only funny if the idea of a man in a dress is funny, we hear that they are not safe for us. An especially insidious one I heard recently: a man in a position of power joked he’d only wear a dress if it was a very expensive brand - a drag queen offered him one, and he declined with a panicked expression; they were my heroine in that moment.
But the joke he made only makes sense if “a man in a cheap dress” is inherently absurd. That is what trans femmes look like when we come out as adults. We did not have friends and family help us learn to dress and style ourselves when it was safe and accepted to make mistakes - if we had that kind of safe home environment that was emotionally attuned to us as the femme people we were, we would generally have come out as children. Even if we have steady work and resources, which many trans femmes do not, buying a totally new wardrobe is a daunting task. We’re gonna look a mess, at first. And we know it.
There’s a further twist of the “comedy” knife: we, the joke’s audience, are being asked to laugh. Trans femmes who transition during adulthood often are just waking up to the layers of denial and coping mechanisms that kept them safe and alive to reach the point they can finally meet themselves and transition. They may well not have a strongly established sense of self-worth, yet. Their traumas are raw and likely still hidden from their own view, emotional triggers that have not even been identified yet, let alone confronted. And these emotionally vulnerable people are being told to laugh at themselves, to degrade and devalue the tiny flickering light of hope and happiness they have painstakingly coaxed into being.
The naked cruelty of that is hard to overstate.
I honestly don’t give a fuck that comedy is hard to write if you cannot punch down. Do better. Don’t say things we cannot unhear.
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When you fumble your biscotti and it sinks beneath the surface of your tea:
Quick! Drink the ocean to reveal the lost biscotti of Atlantis before it crumbles!
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Willow‘s imagined conversation with her HRT provider in 20 years (no, I don’t have any idea if there’s any relevant medical knowledge about trans women, HRT, and lifespan; bluntly, I’d bet strongly against such knowledge existing):
Provider: we should reduce your dose so you can go through menopause.
Willow: fuck you! I spent the first 2/3 of my life in menopause.
Provider: you’ll die sooner.
Willow: but I’ll live longer!
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TFW you kinda want to “know thy enemy” by reading up on a famous asshole who was horrible to people, but people you know and respect are reacting with such trauma you are not sure you want any more details.
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I love being a girl so muuuuuuuuch! 😍🥰💖
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I’m an #asexual #trans #lesbian, which is a particularly cursed combo for reasons I won’t explore here. But suffice it to say I therefor have reason to explore the nuances of what kinds of touch I enjoy, and in doing so I’ve observed that, for me, I experience episodic desire for #SensualTouch that is disconnected from my episodic experience of being horny. I’ve taken to describing this as feeling #SkinThirst.
Some disambiguation: I distinguish being skin thirsty from being chronically touch starved in the same way that wanting to get some sunshine in my hair is different from a chronic vitamin D deficiency - one is an experience I have episodically that might last hours to days, and the other is a long-term lack of something important. Both can be true at the same time, but I mean different things by them.
By way of illuminating the difference from being horny, I’ve observed that when I’m horny, masturbating and having an orgasm can satiate that need. By contrast, feeling skin thirsty cannot be slaked without someone else touching me. It may fade in time on its own, but masturbating does absolutely nothing for it, because my needs for sensual touch are not addressed by sexual activity, except coincidentally. Additionally, I get horny and skin thirsty on TOTALLY different frequencies. I’m horny maybe once a month. I get skin thirsty at least weekly, and often more frequently than that.
And when I say I get skin thirsty, it means I CRAVE focused, intentional touch. Preferably in large quantity. I’ve described this as “making out in such a way as to get a hard R rating.” However, for me, a romantic component isn’t actually required, it is possible to get what I need platonically.
Here are some of my previous threads about this - there’s some fabulous discussion in there, and I was surprised to find how many people experience skin thirst as disconnected entirely from their experience of feeling horny OR that there was a connection, but not one that was entirely one-to-one.
This thread is where I spoke about my explorations of the term “skin thirsty” plus some feedback about it: https://chaosfem.tw/@Willow/113530303076465658
Here are many additional folks responding to me asking for input: https://chaosfem.tw/@Willow/113602672233337549
And this is a poll about it with more comments: https://chaosfem.tw/@Willow/113626166762795325
I continue to post about it with the hashtags #SensualTouch and #SkinThirst.
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K, I have a bespoke tux bought for me by a transphobe for his wedding.
I am now hot. Substantially hotter than this tux.
I was thinking I might trash it, but… maybe I can get it totally retailored?
Does anyone in NYC or New England know a tailor who could handle all this?
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If I may,
Boobs.
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Mirrors. The source of my power; my ultimate weakness.
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Damn, just got cozy to do my shot, opened up my kit, and I forgot a syringe. I have needles! But now must get uncozy to go refill on syringes.
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