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ADHD musing
Random thought occurring to me after I struggled to sleep last night...
There's a thing for a lot of people with ADHD where caffeine is kinda like rolling dice... sometimes it helps you wake up and sometimes it puts you to sleep.
I realized last night I was having a mild dopamine crash (spent all my dopamine on the workday) and I was craving caffeine so I said screw-it, if I can't sleep might as well... within half an hour I think I was out.
So it dawned on me that it could be simply related to our dopamine levels at the time. If we're spent then it's practically impossible to settle down. So when you're spent and otherwise tired, then caffeine is reducing the barrier to sleep as well. It backfires on us because we're still up from the combination of drowsiness and low dopamine, but because it's milder than say ritalin it doesn't drop our drowsiness as much as it raises the dopamine to let you settle...
Wanted to share for what other people think of this possibility?
[#]ADHD #AuDHD #Neurodivergent
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Please Please Please help my little fur-niece out.#MutualAid #Pets #Vetcare #Dogs #help #helprequest #GoFundMe
RE: bsky.brid.gy/convert/ap/at://d…
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RE: newsie.social/users/ProPublica…
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This is from one of the "safer" states. Imagine what it means to be living somewhere like Texas like me... There's a reason I closed registrations on my server, I have no idea of what's coming and this could easily be me any day I leave the house...#lgbt #lgbtqia #lgbtq #transfemme #transwoman
RE: mastodon.social/users/trans_re…
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It hurt... it hurt so much and like so much trauma it's not that obvious until the trauma is past...
I was isolated, not only from other people, but from my own emotions... I wanted so badly to cry but I couldn't, all I could do was bottle it up (not toxic masculinity, literally an effect of testosterone)...
I looked at myself and pretty much didn't see myself... I had no self-image then and now I have one forming.
Before even my transition I figured out I'm grey-ace, now that I have a girlfriend I've really established that I'm grey-ace, emphasis on the grey... 😳
So it's really nothing sexual for me... there's the opposite of gratification there (without details... certain things don't work right anymore...). What it is is feeling at home in my skin, looking at myself in the mirror and finding things I like... sure I get dysphoria and there are plenty of things I don't like about my body... but there's for once in my life alot of things I do like.
And on top of it all... my personality and interactions with the world feel so less discordant... so many of my behaviors were early hints of being a woman... I may never have kids, but it's clear I've had "mother" energy for a looooong time.
... I could keep going but I got a day job to do...
Source of Image
[#]lgbt #transfemme #lgbtqia #lgbtq #transition
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@pluralistic Pinging to see what your opinion is on Bridgy Fed, the Bluesky - AP bridge. I know you have expressed strong negative feelings towards Bluesky that mirror my own, but I haven't caught mention of the bridge yet.
This is brought about especially because I'm trying to convince friends that have bought in to Bluesky to at least bridge and am trying to find bridged accounts to recommend to sweeten the pot (and maybe show them that there are better options than Bluesky...)
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People think Linux needs you to constantly open the terminal to work on things, in part because they see Linux users so often opening the terminal to work on things...
Was just appreciating this morning that the "opening the terminal to fix it" in Linux is a privilege, not a limitation lol.
Sound started glitching this morning, I of course checked the soundbar, unplugged and replugged it, didn't fix it. Switched to TV speakers same problem.
Me being a techie, I'm going "Ah, pipewire glitched out", I pop open the terminal type systemctl --user restart pipewire and voila sound is perfectly fine again.
Do I expect other people to know how to do that to handle an odd sound glitch? No! I expect them "turn it off and on again".
The difference is that in Windows that's the only choice, probably the same with Mac too.
[#]linux
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Lord, The Gamers Youtube series has been fantastic and such a satisfying ending to the season, dear god I hope they get to keep making it.
(Context: this is a follow up to a whole series of movies starting with The Gamers)
[#]TheGamers #DND #TTRPG #Comedy
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Comfort food entertainment... catching up on the Mashle: Muscles and Magic anime.
Basically a himbo in the world of magic navigates life via brute force abusing physics.
[#]anime #comfort #himbo
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This hits hard tbh
[#]lbgt #lgbtqia #lgbt #trans #meme
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Context: there's a local haunted house called Scare For A Cure that raises money for charity and is fully volunteer run. (Last year raised $50k for the Breast Cancer Research Center and also distributed thousands in scholarships and other donations). Additionally this isn't your typical "here's a series of themed rooms and spooks and nothing more", Scare runs a full plotline with interactivity, you do stuff and have a story you're participating in... in addition to getting shot with about a half dozen gore cannons within one hour...
I've been volunteering in different roles throughout the month, with some interruptions here and there. On Saturday, the final night of the event, I was resetting "Jekyll and Hyde's secret storeroom". This involved sneaking in behind groups to replace the mcguffin (a vial of serum) and reset the exit portal. Normally this involves sneaking down the hallway as soon as they're in the storeroom, waiting for the moment they exit the store room to slip in, reset it, then slip back out into the hallway and out a side door... but if groups run close together, I might have to wait in the store room as one group enters the hallway and the next group lingers in the next space, the moment they leave I slip out the door behind them and slip between the buildings to get back to my starting position.
One group however... they were moving so slow and had zero consideration for the fact that there's a production that cares about timing... they caused 2 groups to pile up right behind them. So resetting after them I had to duck into the next room instead of returning back... but then the group right after them was stuck waiting a really long time in that space before they could move forward while another group was in the hall... I literally had nowhere to go and by the sound cues there was only seconds before they came in the room and the group ahead wasn't even starting to leave...
I dropped into the fetal position, started sobbing about how Jekyll killed everyone and just played the victim who was completely broken and hiding, and when they left i cried about how it wasn't safe out there (the portals all led to "in between" spaces where "The Hunter" was).
Funnily enough the guide for that group was the casting director and the actor playing Jekyll/Hyde was one of the main co-directors of the show watching through a crack in the wall going "oh shit" at seeing me still in there.
The actual official plan for that happening was to just suck it up and let it happen... nobody counted on me coming up with split second improvisation to maintain immersion...
[#]improv #acting #volunteering #charity #panic
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Random weekend note: I never thought I'd be proud of myself for assuming the fetal position before...
[#]volunteering #charity #ScareForACure
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Just highlighting that I'm right there in Texas, right in the "Do Not Travel". I am definitively not safe.
[#]lgbtq #trans #uspol #lgbt #lgbtqia
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Slightly sketchy account makes me uncomfortable and others report it... I politely give them a warning to migrate before shutting them down...
Day and a half later "Protocols of the Elders of Zion"... whelp, that's an immediate delete...
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A friend's furbaby is suffering and needs care yesterday, please donate if you can: gofundme.com/f/help-giggles-ge…
[#]MutualAid #pets
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@m shout out to you for giving me a great place to get started in the fediverse and always being my go-to suggestion of a server to start with
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@julia is it okay to direct potential users to eepy.moe? I've interacted with you enough that I can readily vouch for you as an admin
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Just reaching out for suggestions, it's not often I get people converted to the fediverse but when I do I'm a bit short on suggested instances, especially in variety.
As it stands I've got my own instance, which runs Friendica. But because I'm a nerd who craves all the options at once and will sacrifice some user-friendliness for it, it's good for me not for most users.
Aside from that, I've got lgbtqia.space which is a wonderful Mastodon server I started out on in the fediverse. But obviously leaves me fumbling when helping the rare few friends who aren't in the alphabet.
I'd like suggestions of other open instances (aside from the mega instances like mastodon.social) that I can direct people to, especially of different platforms so they have a little more choice in their experience.
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I'm so incredibly done with people being on a high-horse shitting on advances in AI for no other reason than to feel better about themselves.
Like if your issue is things like copyright and training data? Sure, go off, it's a philosophical argument there about rights, economy, etc. Likewise for arguments about ecological impact (it can be made reasonable there, the companies just don't want to).
But if you're just posting bullshit like "Hahaha, the language model can't do math" or "Look at how it was baited into saying something stupid" as proof that it's worthless: go fuck yourself.
Let alone the people who try to relate AI development to "NFT Bros"... NFTs literally don't do shit, AI actually has multiple proven and valid uses cases but if you think it's the same thing that just shows you have your head up your ass and refuse to look at the world around you.
All of that before getting to the fact that they have shown incredible usefulness for disability accommodations, but I guess it doesn't count if you prefer to be ableist and think we don't need or deserve accommodations?
So tired of people in general right now...
[#]AI #LLM
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text/gemini
