I am the songwriter,

the songwriter that likes to eat

many things green and sometimes shiny.

I am the songwriter

singing songs of pickles

though I've never been to

a pickle festival.

I have heard those pickle

festivals can bring

lots of pickles from the countryside

dripping from your fangs.

I have heard those pickle

festivals can bring

lots of yummy food for

your tummy to see.

Do you like your pickles

boiled in vinegar?

Do you prefer the kind refrigerated?

I like my pickles

somewhere in my mouth.

I do not exactly care how they are prepared.

Because I like

lots and lots of pickles.

Small and green and round and oval and sometimes coined.

I like lots of pickles

as long as they go down,

down through my throat to my stomach

somewhere down there, I think.

Do you like to eat your pickles?

And sing more songs that you love

to the pickles that you love?

Do you like pickles?

Singing songs as well?

Because I am exactly the songwriter for you.

I'm the songwriter that sings to his pickles.

And sometimes I sing to other people's pickles.

Because, you know, I really quite like pickles.

Sometimes cucumbers and sometimes peppers, too.

I know some people eat the pickled cabbage.

But, I avoid it. I have my theories!

I don't eat that pickled cabbage, no.

No sauerkraut for me, as far as I can see.

I like pickles! Yummy, yummy pickles.

Lots of pickles for my gullet, you see.

I like my pickles, lots and lots of pickles.

And now I think I'll go and pour some on me.