Date: Wed, 24 May 2000 07:07:42 EDT

From: GirlishBoy@aol.com

Subject: This girlish kid i knew in my childhood(TG)

I was a child of the 80s. I grew up in an upper lower class area just outside

of New York City. I could get into all kinds of stuff about my transformation

growing up from "Dead End Kid" to nurturing social worker but frankly, I

don't wana get into that "David Copperfield crap".............besides, this

story isn't really about me, its about one of the kids i remember vividly

from our block.....this one young boy(we were both like 6 at the time) who

was very effeminate and only played with the girls. His mother was one of

those 60s former-hippies who believed that "everythings OK as long as it

feels good".

At first people in the neighborhood tried to make friendly overtures toward

this family but they always snubbed most of us as being "squares" who

"weren't with it". The weird part was that despite being all liberal and

stuff they seemed to have money. Typical urban liberal intelligencia. If ya

really wana know the truth, I think they were closet yuppies.

I forget the exact circumstances of how this happened but one time this shy,

effeminate little boy came over to play at our house. Now I was a typical

all-American boy you understand.........its just that at age 6 I didn't know

any better about this stuff. It wasn't until like third grade that I got all

bratty and pseudo-macho( like being afraid of catching cooties and stuff).

All i knew at 6 was that this kid seemed to admire me and was willing to give

me lots of waxed lips and gummy bears to express his admiration.

He was very neat and clean and flawlessly polite. Mom loved him but my

brothers kinda gave him the business and all. Alittle rough housing ensued,

and alittle junk was food consumed. We also played guns, wrestled, and

watched "He-Man" cartoons on TV.

The very next day the hippy-mother came over and screamed at my parents for

corrupting her little boy.

"HOW DARE YOU LET HIM PLAY WITH TOY GUNS!!!" she sputtered.

My parents tried to explain to her how healthy they thought the whole

experience was for him and how much they thought "Alittle roughing up" would

do him some good. Hippy-Mom would hear none of it though.

She screamed: "I DON'T WANT YOU TO TURN MY LITTLE BOY INTO A SEXIST MACHO

PIG, I'VE TRAINED HIM TO BE DOCILE AND SENSITIVE AND I WON'T LET YOU SUBVERT

OUR ALTERNATIVE LIFESTYLE!!!".

She went to lamblast our entire family, its traditional belief system, its

faith in God, and our free acceptance of what we thought of at the time as

"God's law". She also complained that we allowed her little proto-vegan to

eat Steakum sandwiches and corn dogs which conflicted with the Salad-only

diet she fed to the testosorone-deprived child. Other complaints included the

rough housing(she was against such aggressive behavior), violent TV (he was

only allowed to watch Lifetime TV), and the cross we had displayed(they

apparantly worshoped witch craft or wicca as they called it). My little

brother became very scared at this point.

"Daddy, i'm scared of the fat, hippy lady, don't let her hurt me" he cried.

"Don't worry little Timmy," father said, "She can't hurt you as long as you

have faith in Christ".

Since my parents didn't believe in interfering with other families, that

seemed to be the end of it. Since the boy attended a differant school and

wouldn't be transferring into our school till the next fall term, we rarely

saw him after that. Usually he was kept in doors, sheltered from our rough

and tumble play. The Hippy-mother seemed to have the whole house under some

kind of quarentine. Rumors were rife that wild godless sex/drug/atheism

orgies were taking place over there at all hours......even SUNDAYS!!

Later in the Sping we saw thier kid walking down the street. By this time he

was like 7 i think. He seemed taller and skinnier and not to have much

energy. He told us he was on an eran to the store to buy some bean curd but

that he wasn't allowed to talk to any of the boys in the neighborhood. We

walked along with him for a few yards until we were out of eye-shot of his

parants. He sadly told us about how much trouble he had gotten into from his

previous visit to us. He went on to say that his mother was determined to rid

him of all sexism and sexual steriotypes.

"I hate not being able to do lots of stuff but I also hate being punished all

the time so I dunno....perhaps i'll get used to it and go along with that

stuff and then i'll be less getting in trouble all the time".

He went on to discribe the regimen of passivity training his mother was

putting him through(the opposite of assertivness training).He was on a

restricted Salad diet to keep him skinny and delicate. He had to wear 98

strength-sunblock at all times to maintain his pale complexion. His skin was

so white and clear that he looked like he could have been painted with white

enamel paint.He also wasn't allowed to cut his hair and it had grown out to

cover his ears. I'm not sure but i think he was forced to wear his sister's

hand- me-downs as well. The label on the pocket of his jeans was like

"flower-somthing or other" plus they had no pockets and this elastic thing on

the waist band. His t-shirt had kind of cupped girlish looking

sleaves........nothing ya could really put yer finger on but it all made us

wonder. The older guys considered beating him up to help him "be less faggy"

but concluded that it was his mothers fault and he couldn't help it.

Besides....he seemed so much like a girl now that I guess it wouldn't have

seemed right.

Later in June we ran into him again. This time he looked VERY girlish. His

shoes(i'm pretty sure) were girl's sneakers. They were short, stubby and

looked cute somehow. They also had green and pink stripes in the sides so i'm

pretty sure they were his sister's or somthing. His pants this time were

DEFINATLY girl's pants(no question!). They were so close fitting that they

looked like leggings. They had those sturrup things toward the feet that

girls wore alot in the 80s and the label on the pocket said "Gapgirl" very

clearly. His lavender cotton sweater had a little lacey collar and i know i'd

seen his sister(who was actually pretty cute)wearing it. The topper was his

hair. It seemed to have been styled like girls......as if his Mom had taken

him out to her hairdresser one day for the fun of it. The back was layered

short but the sides and top were all kind of poofed out like he'd used a

curling iron or somthing. We were all too stunned to give him the business

cause we hardly recognized him. As soon as he realized we weren't going to

beat him up he got over his fear of us. He told us that his mother's efforts

had intensified and that she reasoned;

"If a Soviet women can work in a tractor factory, my son can help with the

house work and wear his sister's old cloths".

He said that all his outgrown boy cloths (none of which longer fit any

longer) had not been replaced and that he was forced to don the discarded

slacks and blouses of his sister. Furthermore he was compeled to move into

his sister's room so that his dad could turn his room into a yoga temple.

Gone were the dark furnature, the "Dokken" posters and the swell Sega gamers

rig. Now his room had pale yellow walls, pretty white furnature with pink

trim, posters of sunsets and ballarinas, and i'm sure if this were the

present day they'd have had one of those like Lime green iMACs sitting on the

wicker vanity. He said the most awkward part was getting used to wearing his

sister's old floor length "Holly Hobby" flannel nighties and sleeping with

curlers in his hair(his mother apparantly loved experimenting with hairstyles

on him).

Apparantly his mother seemed to have decided that she couldn't tolerate

having another male in her house so she decided to turn her son into a

feminized little boy...interchangable with his sister. One thing kind of

struck me though...i could put my finger on it exactly, then it hit me. His

tight fitting pants revealed that his crotch area was completely flat. As if

he had never "had one" to begin with and I KNOW he DID have "one" at least

from that time we had wrestled togather. He later explained how his mother

compelled him to wear like a junior girdle or somthing.....to hid "it". Then

we noticed somthing else. In his "My pretty pony"-knapsack he had a barbie

doll. We kind of razzed him about this but he said that he was only allowed

now, to play with girl's toys and that he actually had learned to have fun

"Playing Barbies" with his sister and her friends, and had grown to enjoy it.

We were totally freaked out, this kid really was BECOMING a little girl.

The summer went by in a flash.......fireworks, baseball, swimming at the

community center, fishing in the canal, beating up the loosers from west of

South Main Street, corn on the cob, killing stray cats, and labor day

weekend. With heavy hearts we anticipated the start of the fall term.

On the first day we started sizing up the new kids( two dorky girls, and

three guys).There seemed to be no sign of "our friend" though. We were sure

that he must have cut his hair by now though. After all he was now in school

and would look ridiculous showing up in school dressed in girlie stuff. To

say nothing of the fact that the parents would get in trouble for......ummm

i'm not sure what...but its gotta be illegal to cross dress yer kids

right?!?!?

We looked around all over the yard but there was no sign of him. We figured

they musta locked the whole family up in the nut house where they belong. The

two new girls were sort of cute (although i still thought all girls had

cooties at this time). One new boy was from the midwest and pronounced the

word:"waterfront" all screwy. Sort of like:"Wawww-ter front" instead of

"Woh-ter front" like we said it. We gave him a real hard time....wedgies,

charley horses, and dumped his lunch in the woods(after stealing his fruit

rollups). The second new kid was from Yonkers. His dad was a cop and they

were moving away from Yonkers cause of how that area was changing. This guy

was all right cause he didn't take no crap and said the word "water" the

right way.

Anyways, the bell rang and we all wandered into class. The usual crap

ensued......seat assingments, class rules,"welcome to our opportunity to

help, learn, grow, bla bla bla". One of the new rules we hated was the dress

code. Boys had to wear lace up leather shoes, dark (non-jeans) pants, and a

neat buttoned up shirt....YICK!! Girls i guess weren't allowed to wear pants

or sneakers. I mention this cause during attendance one of the new girls was

singled out as not conforming to the dress code. She was the only girl not

wearing a dress or a skirt. She was wearing these sneakers that somehow

looked familiar(i'm wasn't sure why), purple jeans,and this really gay

looking t-shirt( had like a rainbow and a unicorn). I remember she had

sholder length carefully styled blond hair and was actually kind of pretty

but also strangly familiar somehow. Our new Yonkers friend immidiatly began

looking at her with longing eyes.

"Come on dear" said the teacher, "Lets get your mother to come by and get you

into a nice dress like the other girls".

At this point the new girl seemed embarrassed and confused, THEN IT HIT ME!!!

IT WASN'T a girl at all....it was THAT girlish-kid from my street!!! His hair

was so long now and his mannerisms so feminine that there was NO WAY you'd

think he was a boy. We totally freaked out, he detected our recognition and

turned beet red. The Yonkers kid though we were full of it and insisted that

it HAD to be a girl and that we were just mad at him cause we thought he

liked the girl.

Anyway a quick check of the school records revealed him to indeed be a boy

and i can tell you the principal was utterly speechless. A scadal ensued, he

was sent home, Child Welfare was called in, freedom of expression issues were

raised. In the end he was home schooled and we didn't see him again until

winter.

Later in February we got snow, tons of it. As usual all the boys poured out

into the street for the snow day to play in the park near the community

center where we go swimming. We had some awsome snowball fights. As usual it

was the boys out on the soccer field waring and the girls hanging closer to

the building and feeding birds and making snow-angels. Since there was a

party later inside all the little girls were wearing party dresses. Outside

it was hard to see which girls were who cause they were so bundled up. They

typically wore little white rubber boots, white tights(with tiny mud spatter

marks where their legs were exposed), fuzzy bonets, and these big elaborite

dressy coats that seemed to be the thing that year.

These coats looked real expensive and were generally either red or blue with

black velvet trim. They were very long and contained a ton of fabric with

deep pleats. You always saw girls wearing them to like church or somthing

like that. Sometimes if a girl was especially prissy she might own several of

these coats and wear them all the time like to school and stuff.

One little girl looked especially familiar. Her coat looked real heavy ,

expensive and lady-like. That damned coat musta weighed more than she did.

Her legs were thin and bird like and every now and then her little wrists

peeked through between her white mittens and coat sleave. For some reason i

vividly remember noticing her wrists and how they resembled soft delicate

little twigs. Later, but not before giving ourselves the appropriate cooties

shots, we went in for hot cider and cake.

As the kids all peeled off thier out-door duds i could'nt help noticing the

little girl from before. She had her enormous coat off and when she took off

her hat i suddenly realized who i was secretly admiring.........IT WAS THAT

BOY from my street. BUT NOW!!! Oh man, NOW, "he" was totally changed. He

looked TOTALLY 100% like a girl. There was NO WAY you could have thought for

even half a second that this kid wasn't completely a girl. And not just any

girl.....a real GIRLIE girl, a real prissy, super-girlish girl. I wasn't sure

what to think.....His hair was VERY long now.......long, full, curled, heavy,

and all the way down to his mid back area. I really have to say his hair was

pretty as hell. He or his mother obviously spent alot of time on it. It was

like these cascading tresses that fell all the way down to his mid back. It

couldn't have been naturally curly that way though....he had to have used

like those great big curlers cause his curls were big, fat, tight, bouncy

curls. His dress was this typical pink and white party dress that poofed way

out from his rib cage down to his knees and made him look like some little

junior Miss Cinderella.

She...ummm he was trying to remove his little girlie white boots and then

suddenly we made eye contact. She blushed and giggled....i guess she felt

safe....no way would anyone harm a flower this delicate in a public place.

Anyway I think I had to be the ONLY person left who had any true inkling as

to his past. Nobody else seemed to have any idea she was a boy. In

fact.....he seemed to have become one of the most popular girls in the group.

To show there was no hard feelings i was like,

"Ummm can i help you get those boots off"?

So i'm helping "her" pull off "her" tiny boots and i'm feeling real

weird.....like the way I always feel when i'm near a girl I secretly have a

crush on......but this is REALLY a boy..a boy with very long hair, wearing a

girl's party dress!!! But i just wasn't sure........so i asked him:

"Umm did your mother turn you into a girl?"

She giggled and said:

"Sort of but not for real yet, I've been slowly being made more and more

girlish by mommy. At first i didn't like it, and resisted as best as i could,

then i began fighting it less and less.....it was easier that way, then i

realized parts of it i liked.....such as playing Barbies. Later i began to

look forward to feeling all pretty and trying differant styles and stuff.

Slowly i hated more and more boyish stuff and loved more and more girlish

stuff. Mom sensed this and kept making me go further and further....i wore my

first dress to a birthday party held at a family restaurant with my new

friends and it was so much fun. I wasn't just going along with this anymore,

i was wanting to be a girl all the time now just as much as mommy wanted me

to be a girl. I told my mother,

"Mommy i'm sorry I wasn't being good before, uuuum like really........now i'm

glad you made me be all girlish, i'd like it if you did it EVEN more".

"Mommy was real happy when i told her that. She gave me a big hug, told me

how much she loved me and said what a pretty little girl i'd turned into. She

said that like she had had so much fun playing dressup and stuff with my

sister that she badly wanted to have another little girl....especially so my

sister could have like a little sister to play with and tell secrets to and

stuff. She also said that she hated it when i turned out to be a boy when I

was born cause boys were so bad so much....

....Now Mommy gave me a real "forever-girls name" and made a rule that from

now on I had to wear dresses and skirts like ALL the time. I liked that rule

at first, but it took some getting used to. At first it felt weird always

having a breeze going up at my panties....made me feel afraid that people

might be able to see my panties if the wind blew up.......sort of felt like I

wasn't totally wearing cloths. Even though I love these full poofy dresses,

they get caught in the wind alot and the skirt part always getting twisted

around in the wind when i'm outside so its like coiling around my legs making

it hard to walk. Ya know when you wear dresses like ALL the time you can only

move in certain ways so anyway....it took some getting used to but NOW i'm so

used to it that i don't feel comfortable in pants any more....

....I wore pants for the first time in months last week cause i had to go on

this field trip and they felt sooo icky. It was like feeling this yucky

fabric clinging to my legs, not allowing them to move togather. It felt soooo

weird not being able to feel the skin on my left leg always feeling the skin

on my right leg........Its funny cause people noticed that even though i

wasn't wearing a dress, i still moved around AS IF i was wearing a dress.

Anyway next time i'll just wear like a really heavy skirt and knee

socks....that'll keep me warm enough. So to answer yer question, yeah mommy

IS turning me into a girl. She said when i turn 10 i can start taking these

purple pills that will make me grow bumps like mommy has so that i can wear a

bra. Later she also said when i got older i could go to a special doctor who

could put me to sleep and do an operation in my tummy so that it would make

it so i wouldn't have to wear girdles anymore and would HAVE to go pee

sitting down like mommy and my sister do. If I did this, mommy said i'd be a

REAL GIRL FOREVER.....she even said that somday they MIGHT even be able make

it so I can have babys and be a mommy myself when i grow up".

I sat there stunned at what this 7 year old "girl in training" was telling

me. I only remember all these details cause it was so vivid and memorable at

the time. My whole little world view was being turned upside down. I was so

confused and full of immature mixed emotions all i could say was:

"Yeeeeah, well i bet you already had that operation already and are just

scared to admit it. Look at you in that dress with those curls, yer the

girliest girl in the room and i'll bet you got the most cooties of anyone!"

Then i stuck my tongue at her and just went about my business.

Later in the summer i saw her at the pool wearing a girls bathing

suit.....she ummmm, i mean he, must have put it on carefully cause you

couldn't see ANYTHING sticking out.....he looked all-girl. I tried hard to

stare and see if there was anything putruding but there was nothing there but

smooth emptyness. At this point a few of the guys saw i was staring up close

at a girl so they gave me hard time calling me a "girl lover" so i got all

embarrassed and just ran home. Later on when we were all mostly like 12 and

started liking girls i saw her again at an Interschool Debate Meet. I only

recognized her cause of the name. Oh MAN, she was MAD-beautiful now!! Long

tresses of hair, smooth nubile skin, and small pert breasts poking through

her white blouse( i guess her mom had started giving her those purple pills).

She seemed to have transfered into an all-girls private school(the one we

were having the meet with).

It sucked cause our school's team was mostly guys and we got clobbered by

these snotty private school girls. They were all so full of

themselves.....perfect gramar, reserved mannerisms, flawless french

pronounciation. Thier school had one of those annoyingly snotty names that

LOOKS like it should be pronounced one way but is supposed to be pronounced

another. We know this cause we were CORRECTED several times. The whole thing

was em-pukifying. What ever happened to the egalitarianism of "her" liberal

hippy mom.....sending her to a place like that? Its always the Eastern

Liberal Establishment where ya see this stuff.

Anyway I think her dad cut down on his pot cause he had this derivatives firm

or somthing......so now they had even MORE money to help spread their screwy

ideas and help make working stiffs like me even more stiff........i mean

stiffed. These girls all wore uniforms of short greenish plaid skirts, polo

shirts, no make up, and doc martins. I know they had to be losers cause one

of them had a Phish logo on her jean jacket. Anyways it hurt. She was so

beautiful.......ultra thin waist,totally feminized bone structure, you could

tell every guy wanted to make out with her and all the girls were jealous. I

was going to go up and say something but lost my nerve and anyway...I had to

go camp out for Gun n Roses tickets that night. Later on I beat up this one

Goth kid as revenge and broke his "Cure" CD in half.

Epilogue:

She went on to have her operation at 18, graduated from Colgate, and ended up

in PR work. Shes now married, has two adopted babies and is active in

transgender issues.