Oh my god y'all the Section 31 Star Trek movie is so bad. And I'm an unrepentant "will watch the odd numbered films" person.
It's so bad I can't even be mad at the corruption of the ideals of Star Trek that Section 31 represents.
This movie is absolutely a grab bag of success formulas for movies tossed in a blender. It is the pizza steak avocado and orange juice smoothie of movies.
It's like you take the Fifth Element, Ocean's 11, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (the movie), Guardians of the Galaxy, and the JJ Abrams Trek movies, toss 'em in a blender, and take out the good parts.
Michelle Yeoh is not enough to save this movie. Jamie Lee Curtis appearing as a cyborg is not enough to save this movie.
I can usually enjoy any movie even if I come away with notes.
I did not enjoy this movie. It wasn't suffering to watch because it was so bad it was easy to blot out the idea of it ever being considered canon, but it was in fact terrible. This movie is midichlorians bad.
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The most enjoyable part of this movie was writing this scathing post. This movie did not spark joy.
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If this movie were a DVD it would replace Star Trek V in the hall of shame next to Highlander 2.
This movie cuts its own bangs at 3am.
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You know how Star Trek dialogue can be kinda wooden and they won't let the actors improvise or ad lib at all and sometimes it really cramped their performances?
This movie leans into that so hard.
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If you want a relatively unmemorable bad movie that's visually very pretty, Section 31 fits the bill I guess but you could just go watch Jupiter Ascending. Then you'd at least have some bizarre bits to tell people about.
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@aredridel Jupiter Ascending is a pretty movie that is not good but just has so many weird interesting ideas along with decent enough performances that you can at least imagine how it could have been great.
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@r343l Yes!
where S31 is a movie with some awesome if overdone ideas cribbed from obvious places, none of which they actually performed competently and/or at all. You could imagine an entirely different movie that was good, but not this movie only somehow good.
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