Friend: What would you do if you found a sleeping vampire in a coffin?
Me: Prank them
Friend: What, you wouldn't stake them through the heart?
Me: Nah, I'd draw a huge cock on their forehead in permanent marker
Friend: Wouldn't that piss them off and make them kill you?
Me: How would they know, are you going to tell them?
Friend: But they'd see it as soon as they looked in..... ah... no reflections.
Me: It's the perfect prank.
Me: Now... skin up you stingy git.
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