Ancestors

Toot

Written by V0ldek@awful.systems on 2024-10-04 at 00:27

None of those words are in the Bible 2.0 (Tossed Salads And Scrumbled Eggs — Ludicity)

https://awful.systems/post/2535122

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from V0ldek@awful.systems

Descendants

Written by froztbyte@awful.systems on 2024-10-04 at 04:14

yeah, enterprise agile is a whole thing. for companies who want to do agile. how do you do agile? well you hire Agile Practitioners, of course!

see also this for further psychic injury

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from froztbyte@awful.systems

Written by V0ldek@awful.systems on 2024-10-04 at 09:34

AaaaAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaAAAAAAA!

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from V0ldek@awful.systems

Written by froztbyte@awful.systems on 2024-10-04 at 10:10

you haven’t really startup’d 'till you’ve been jumpscared by this at A3+ poster size in the coffee/social area

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from froztbyte@awful.systems

Written by Amoeba_Girl@awful.systems on 2024-10-04 at 13:22

I can’t imagine viewing them can elicit anything but debilitating anxiety, what the fuck

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from Amoeba_Girl@awful.systems

Written by Amoeba_Girl@awful.systems on 2024-10-04 at 13:26

Management training has got to be more dehumanising than the army at this point

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from Amoeba_Girl@awful.systems

Written by froztbyte@awful.systems on 2024-10-04 at 15:34

The next time I spot one of these in the wild, I plan to ask nearly-located juniors some loaded but unpointed questions

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from froztbyte@awful.systems

Written by misterbngo@awful.systems on 2024-10-04 at 15:01

Id unironically quit and start a competitor, because they’re so bogged down in this ceremony bullshit.

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from misterbngo@awful.systems

Written by V0ldek@awful.systems on 2024-10-04 at 13:33

So this is what he meant when he said “funds are SAFe”

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from V0ldek@awful.systems

Written by David Gerard on 2024-10-04 at 09:20

Scrum: the methodology when The Mgt. says “agile” but will accept nothing less than waterfall in practice

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from dgerard@awful.systems

Written by froztbyte@awful.systems on 2024-10-04 at 10:09

waterfacile

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from froztbyte@awful.systems

Written by David Gerard on 2024-10-04 at 10:13

waterfragile

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from dgerard@awful.systems

Written by Amoeba_Girl@awful.systems on 2024-10-04 at 10:22

I’m sorry, my only thought on the matter has only ever been: scrotum master.

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from Amoeba_Girl@awful.systems

Written by antifuchs@awful.systems on 2024-10-04 at 11:57

Yes we do AGIle: we ask ChatGPT what our customers want and then ask it to write software to fulfill those requirements. Every two weeks it writes up some imaginary sprint retrospective meeting notes. Planning poker doesn’t work so well, this iteration isn’t so good at bluffing yet.

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from antifuchs@awful.systems

Written by froztbyte@awful.systems on 2024-10-04 at 11:58

oh dear god how did I not see that before

that’s wonderfully cursed, bravo!

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from froztbyte@awful.systems

Written by Sailor Sega Saturn on 2024-10-04 at 16:03

“The common people pray for integration tests, healthy production, and five nines that never end,” SWE Jorah told her. “It is no matter to them if the high lords play their scrum of scrums, so long as they are left in peace.” He gave a shrug. "They never are.”

=> More informations about this toot | More toots from sailor_sega_saturn@awful.systems