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● 12.20.15

●● EPO Management Discovers Media is Against It

Posted in Europe, Humour, Patents at 8:22 am by Dr. Roy Schestowitz

Summary: Downfall of the EPO’s management in the form of a video

THE EPO tackled with an epic “Downfall“. I made this in a rush, so there are some mistakes in the video, some of which corrected in the transcript beneath (in bold fonts). I could re-render with the corrections, but it would take nearly half an hour.

=> ↺ EPO

Transcript:

Journalists are stating to write about our illegitimate activitiesIt has spread from Dutch and German newspapers to French and English onesWe estimate that it’s just a matter of time before we’re widely viewed as the Pariah of EuropeAnd it won’t be long before officers come to raid our HQ in MunichTell FTI Consulting and Control Risks to get this under controlSirSun KingThey couldn’t find any legitimate dirt on Els HardonThey even tried calling her “sniper” but the public isn’t buying itI thought we had enough scapegoats in that judge, Hardon, Weaver, and BrummeWe’re losing to that “Mafia”I thought you told the media there was an armed NaziWhy did you not obey my order to force the board to sack that bloody judge?Now my own job is at riskThey told me Control Risks has Stasi contacts in DesaAnd that they could sniff out the sources to all these bloggers with the I.U.My goons are just a bunch of incompetent people incapable of understanding the Streisand EffectSigning that Control Risks contract was the I.U.‘s ideaNow look at all those articles about my horrible track record, I’d never get a job againHow do you think we feel about our own prospects?Those Control Risks scum are a disgrace and a waste of moneyCan’t even do an investigation rightI told them we have no dough on the accused, they need to make shit upMight as well claim that SUEPO is a violent union with knives and forksAll I wanted was my precious Unitary Patent Court for major applicantsBut the European public just keeps finding out I’m totally out of my mindNow I know what Napoleon felt like when he invaded RussiaInstead of viewing me as an heroic President my staff now compares me to StalinI never even got a Ph.D. like they didAll I have is some French diploma of a wannabeBut I tried to offer them a corporate occupation of EuropeAmateurs!Nobody loves me and nobody ever respected me all alongThe German people all along knew that I was up to no goodBut I still have a plan BI will cut their pay for each day they protestI’ll drown in my own blood before they force me to obey German lawElodie, it’ll be alrightI don’t even know if the Unitary Patent will ever happenGiven all these scandals, nobody will believe a word that I sayMight as well call off the FTI Consulting contractEurope may keep its autonomyBut guys, don’t fool yourselves. I haven’t given up on sending boards as far as Berlin.They’re going to pay for not obeying my ordersLet SUEPO vote in a replacement for me

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